In recent days and weeks we've seen a lot of activity on the "gay rights" front. And it's not going to go away any time soon - or quietly for that matter.
What I found most striking is the fact that the issue is being addressed by state legislatures at a time when local budgets are in crisis and the common taxpayer is under assault. Instead, of dealing head long with those issues that affect the entire population, liberal governors and legislators are taking time to address, and dare I say appease a very small but vocal minority.
The politics are bad enough, and frankly, I don't want to address this subject from that angle. I believe there is a more important angle. It is a matter of the heart and mind.
To be bluntly honest, this post is in response to a text conversation that I was having with my daughter a while back. I never fully answered her questions and in the meanwhile, some other thoughts have come to my mind.
I know that I'm not going to make everyone happy, but the fact of the matter is what I say and teach as an adult Sunday school teacher has to be a part of my worldview. I can't have one worldview for my public life and one for my private life. Some would call that schizophrenic or hypocritical. As a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, I put my complete trust in the truthfulness of His Word. Since God is immutable or unchanging, He doesn't have one set of rules for the generations of 2 millenia ago and another for today.
The one comment that my daughter made that has been seared on my mind since our conversation is this: "But daddy, don't you care about their happiness?"
Here's my answer:
Dear Bethany,
I love you. Since you first came into our family, I have loved you as my daughter. You have been the apple of my eye.
We have had many conversations on a myriad of subjects over the years. Now that you are married and a mom, I treasure our father-daughter relationship even more. We can each speak and reason as adults. We know when emotions are getting in the way and how to best acknowledge and respect those emotions. We are the emotional ones in our family! We sometimes wear it on our respective sleeves.
I apologize for taking so long to present my answer to you. Although it's been percolating in my mind for months, I haven't made the time to speak to you about it.
Over the past week, a trade press article crossed my desk that brought back our conversation. I was asked my opinion of the article and how I, as a Christian, would deal with it. On the business front, my answer is still not clear, but ... It's never an easy thing to mix personal moral, religious and philosophical beliefs with money. There is typically much conflict. But deal with it I must.
You asked me, "Daddy, don't you care about their happiness?" (referring particularly to a long time friend of hers and a former employee of mine and his relationship with his boyfriend. He happens to be gay. He is a fine young man. And there are a couple of other gay young men and women who I love as friends of yours. They are always welcome in our home.). The short answer is, yes, I do care. A person's personal happiness is almost paramount in my thinking. I want people to be the best they can be and achieve the most they are able to.
But that answer is not complete. There's a "but" to the answer. And the "but" is critical.
I know that you know and understand my thinking and my beliefs, but I have to, I must fully articulate them. Furthermore, I believe you understand that it has always been my desire to respect people for who they are: People; Human beings. They are not "hyphenated" people. Each person that crosses my path, be it personal, social or professional, I do my absolute best to see them as God sees them: a beautiful creation, made in His image, endowed with His attributes. We are not angels. We are not demons. We are human beings; created to love God and one another.
In order to fully love God and one another, we must be in proper alignment. God must be first and foremost in our lives. He is the Creator. I am the creature. He is Holy and Perfect (in every way). I am not. He is infallible in everything that He is and does. I am completely fallible. I am a sinner by nature. Whatever I do, no matter how "good", falls far short of God's Perfection.
Understanding that, I realize that in order to be in a right relationship with God, I need a Savior. I need to be made "right" in His sight. I can only be right through Christ and the work of the Cross. That is the only thing that sets me right before God. There is nothing I can do. There is nothing you can do. There is nothing any of us can do to merit a relationship with God except coming to Him as we are, worts and all, seeking forgiveness and accepting the free gift of Christ and the Cross.
If I don't, I am forever lost. God graciously sought me and bought me. I am His. Each of you, you and your brothers, can not coast into God's Grace on my or mom's coattails, you have had to do it on your own.
In order to protect us from ourselves, God set in place certain rules for living. He set those rules in place so that we could experience the best possible lives (in this life anyway) available. It's pretty simple: follow the rules, don't get (or at least minimize, outside influences not withstanding) hurt.
To every action, there is a consequence. Stay out all night, you'll be tired. Don't do your homework, you don't do well in school. Drink excessively, you'll get drunk and be sick (at least). Mess around and don't abstain from sex before marriage, and suffer a broken heart, broken relationship and maybe an "unwanted" pregnancy. Fool around with pornography and the like, and mess up your marriage relationship. Don't take your work seriously, you'll be fired (or at least not promoted). Don't discipline your kids properly, the family will suffer. Don't watch your money, and you don't keep it. Those are the negative sides. You can make all of those positive with positive consequences.
Not to be long-winded, but even the word "consequences" is interesting. Literally, it means "with sequences" in other words, "things will follow..."
And so it is with our personal spiritual lives. As you read and study God's Word, you grow in love and knowledge of your Father. Pray regularly, you develop a conversation and an ongoing relationship. Follow His Word and His commands, out of love, and live. God offers us LIFE! God wants the absolute BEST for our lives!
God loves us because He Himself is love.
Our sin, our misdeeds, doing things as we want to, not as God wants us to live, only leads to misery, despair and eventual death. Hey, I don't write the rules of the game of Life; God does. In the end it will be actual physical and spiritual death. If we are right in God's eyes, we will live. If we don't, we will die.
And so, do I want them to be happy? Yes. But more importantly, I want them to live! I am more concerned about their eternal life and soul more than their temporal happiness. Eternal is ... eternity; a long time, forever. Temporal is just that, temporary. Compared to eternity, our lives on this spinning ball of iron is a tick of the clock, no more.
I would like all of you - you, your brothers, your friends and other family members - to come to a saving knowledge of Jesus and His Work at the Cross. That's all that eternally matters. But you can only do that on your own. I can't make you. Not even God can make you come to Himself. He comes to you (and all of us) with a gentle knock at the door of our hearts. At some point in time, we don't know when, He will stop knocking. We don't or won't answer because of our hardened hearts that prefer a life of sin and "fun" rather than a life of holiness and love.
Do I struggle with the cares and sin of this life? Yes. Until He takes me home, I always will. But I know where I am eternally headed. I can love you (and mom and your brothers) best because He loves me first.
I pray for you, your husband, your son. You are all dearly loved.
Be well. I love you!
Daddy
